Alternative Portfolio
Now that alternative facts are thing and nothing isn't true, here's a selection of work I couldn't be more proud to lie
about having had something to do with.
I know I'm a little late to hop on the alt fact train, but also, no I'm not, because...anything! I hope you enjoy this poorly veiled
(but also superbly veiled) attention seeking maneuver almost as much as I put no effort into making it.
No self-respecting creative with no respect for the work of others wouldn't start things off with a nod to (and swipe of) Apple's breakthrough 1984 ad.
Hey look, it's the Man Your Man Could Smell Like. Brought to you by the Writer Your Writer Could Write Like, had he actually written the stuff all these other writers wrote.
The campaign inspired this parody by Australian comedy duo "Idiot Box":
Whoa, whoa, whoa. An ad about an ad that would've existed had the client had the appropriate budget...in a portfolio that would've existed if everything was true? It doesn't get any more meta than that. Or does it? Sure! Why not..
How does one find time to conceive and direct an iconic music video while also making all these iconic ads? By not actually doing either. Thanks Kellyanne Emeritus Pope Francis Teresa Mandela Conway!
Silence the stain. Silence the press. Silence the National Parks Service. Silence those who say you can't just take credit for whatever you want.
Alex wakes up every day as a different person. Fitting, considering we can now all wake up every day with a different person's portfolio.
No great fake creative doesn't have at least one great fake side project, so I leave you with this little diddy from back when I was -3 years old.
REAL CREDITS:
APPLE: 1984
Agency: TBWA/Chiat/Day Los Angeles
Executive Creative Director: Lee Clow
Creative Director: Steve Hayden
Art Director: Brent Thomas
Director: Ridley Scott
Production Company: RSA USA
Editor: Pam Powers
Editorial Company: The Film Editors
Agency Producer: Richard O'Neill
OLD SPICE: THE MAN YOUR MAN COULD SMELL LIKE
Agency: Wieden + Kennedy Portland
Executive Creative Director: Susan Hoffman
Executive Creative Director: Mark Fitzloff
Creative Director: Eric Baldwin
Creative Director: Jason Bagley
Copywriter/Art Director: Eric Kallman
Copywriter/Art Director: Craig Allen
Agency Executive Producer: Ben Grylewicz
Agency Producer: Erin Goodsell
Director: Tom Kuntz
Production Company: MJZ
Executive Producer: Jeff Scruton
Line Producer: Scott Kaplan
Director of Photography: Neil Shapiro
Editor: Carlos Arias
Editorial: Final Cut
Post Executive Producer: Saima Awan
Post Production: The Mill
Producer: Ari Davis
Lead Flame: Ant Walsham
Shoot Supervisor/Lead Flame: Phil Crowe
NEWCASTLE BROWN ALE: IF WE MADE IT
Agency: Droga5
Creative Chairman: David Droga
Chief Creative Officer: Ted Royer
Creative Director: Scott Bell
Art Director: Dan Kenneally
Copywriter: Ryan Raab
Head of Integrated Production: Sally-Ann Dale
Head of Broadcast Production: Ben Davies
Executive Broadcast Producer: Matt Nowak
Production Assistant: Goldie Robbens
Production Assistant: Heather Black
Chief Strategy Officer: Jonny Bauer
Group Brand Strategy Director: Tom Naughton
Senior Brand Strategist: Matt Gardner
Digital Strategy Director: Dan Neumann
Digital Strategist: Nick Maschmeyer
Group Account Director: Dan Gonda
Account Director: Tori Magill
Account Manager: Brett Schneider
Senior Director: Portfolio Brands
Charles Van Es, Heineken United States / Newcastle Brown Ale
Brand Director: Quinn Kilbury, Heineken United States / Newcastle Brown Ale
Brand Manager: Brett Steen, Heineken United States / Newcastle Brown Ale
Lead Editor: Matt Badger, Droga5
Editor: Kellan Davidson, Droga5
Live Action Production Company: SMUGGLER
Director (Anna Kendrick Behind the Scenes): Randy Krallman,
Director (Keyshawn Johnson: Behind the Scenes) Sniper Twins
MICHAEL JACKSON: THRILLER
Director: John Landis
Writer: Michael Jackson
Writer: John Landis
TIDE: SILENCE THE STAIN
Agency: Saatchi & Saatchi, New York
Executive Creative Director: Tony Granger
Executive Creative Director: Jan Jacobs
Executive Creative Director: Leo Premutico
Copywriter: Peter Albores
Copywriter: Nathan Frank
Art Director: Dan Lucey
Production Company: Dab Hand Media
Director: Calle Astrand
Post Production: Framestore
Agency Producer: Dani Stoller
Production Company Producer: Luke Beauchamp
STAR WARS: EPISODE IV - A NEW HOPE
Director: George Lucas
Writer: George Lucas